Energy Exiles Cricket Club

Match Summary: vs. Hawes, Saturday, 16 Aug 2008

Ground: Hawes
Captain: Andrew Wingfield
Match type: 40 overs
Toss: Hawes elected to field
Weather: Cloudy, damp pitch
Opposition: Hawes scored: 54 all out (30.1 overs)
Exiles Score: 134 for 9 (40 overs)
Result: Won by 80 runs
Man of the match: Simon Gundry 76 & 3 for 3

With poor weather forecast for most of the afternoon, and the majority of the team nursing hangovers, the exiles made their way to Hawes CC's picturesque ground with little hope of completing a game of cricket, let alone, winning a game of cricket. However, such glum predictions proved to be well wide of the mark, as Exiles enjoyed excellent cricket weather, and a great result against competitive hosts.

Upon arriving at the ground, Gunders pronounced it to be the prettiest place he'd ever played at. The fact that he did so while gazing longingly towards a field of sheep raised eyebrows amongst a number of his team mates, as he had already had one run-in with the local wildlife (which led to an accusation of hedgicide), and would go on to have another (during which he received a love bite from a playful pony named Dobbin) on the Exiles Sunday Ramble.

Gunders wasn't the only one to take a shine to the local wildlife either. Martin carried on where he left off the previous night, by chasing the young birds who'd flocked to watch the cricket. However, these weren't last nights barely legal fillies. No sir, these were in fact the rogue hens which spent most of the afternoon fertilising the outfield, and occasionally interrupting play with forays onto the wicket. Fortunately they only ventured onto the wicket when Phil was bowling, so there was very little danger of them being hit by the ball. Jasper too was rather taken by the chicks (chucks) at the ground, and spend most of his free time snapping them from various strange and exotic angles, mostly from behind, as his photo catalogue will attest.

Anyway, moving on from this sinister yet rich seam of comic goodness, Andy lost the toss, and the Hawes skipper sensibly elected to bowl first on what was a very soggy wicket (though hats off to the groundsman who managed to produce a playable wicket only 2 days after the square had been totally submerged following flooding earlier in the week!).

Anyway, champion batsmen Wil and Jasper opened the batting, and found the going was tough in the face of some accurate bowling from Hawes' opening youngsters, on what was a very slow pitch. Whilst the going got tough, unfortunately our tough openers were unable to get going, with both perishing cheaply and relatively quickly. Fortunately, Patel, our stylish number three, looked full of confidence as he strode towards the wicket. In an attempt to rough up the exiles talismanic stroke-maker, the young opening bowler saw fit to drop one short, to see what this fellow Patel was really made of. Amil's eyes lit up at the opportunity presented to him, and rocked back, launching into a glorious textbook pull shot, the like of which Brian Lara could only dream about playing. Indeed, so cleanly did Amil think he had middled the ball, he didn’t even feel it connect with the bat. However, this was nothing to do with good timing. While Amil was straining to see if his ball had cleared the boundary rope, everyone else was actually watching the ball trickle towards off stump on its 3rd bounce, after having virtually stopped dead off the pitch. With a more sustained appeal for LBW, Amil may in fact have perished first ball. However, the muted appeal, coupled with the fact that even if the ball had gone on to hit the wicket, its velocity was such that the bails would in all probability have remained intact, meant that he was spared such embarrassment (though I bet Naren would've given him out!).

This incident acted as a warning to all exiles batsmen that run scoring would be very difficult, and that anything straight should be defended at all costs. Unfortunately, Gunders and, perhaps surprisingly, the eccentric number 8 Thomas were the only ones who actually paid any attention to this warning.

Whilst Patel and Taylor (our Australian debutant) threatened to develop a decent partnership, both perished to attacking shots whilst trying to force the pace, bringing Gundry and Hodgson to the crease. Scoring remained difficult, and Hodgson soon gave his wicket away cheaply, with an uppish flick off the pads, though Gundry's resolute defence of pretty much every delivery would form the platform for some excellent counter attacking later in the innings. Assisted first by some strong defence from the skipper, and then more notably from Thomas after Wingfield had given his wicket away with an ungainly honk across the line, the exiles began to fight back.

Thomas performed an admirable role in support of Gundry, with his typical energetic and gung-ho approach shelved in favour of more circumspect defensive prodding. The forcefulness of Thomas’s defensive stretching was such that he would later be heard to complain of some stiffness in the groin, and an aching left knee... When Gunders began to accelerate the scoring rate with some lusty blows on both sides of the wicket (including two sixes which ended up with lost balls in the middle of the river!), Thomas remained calm, picking up occasional singles. Indeed, at one stage, Thomas took on the dominant role in the innings. Perhaps conscious that Gunders may have been getting over-exited as he approached 50, Thomas took it upon himself to take as much strike as possible from our aggressive all rounder, and, by taking the strike for four consecutive overs, was able to guide Gunders home to his maiden half century for the Exiles.

Though both Thomas and Gundry perished before the end of the innings, their work had already been done. After a short cameo from Phil, who delivered a strike rate of 100%, but who was unfortunately only at the crease for two deliveries, it was left to some borrowed youngsters from Hawes to bat out the final over, leaving us with a competitive total of 134, thanks mainly to Simon’s remarkable (in the circumstances) 76 runs off 84 balls.

Tea was taken, and it was a truly delicious affair. I must confess to having had about four platefuls myself, which meant I had to decline the opportunity to open the bowling. If for nothing else, we should make sure we play Hawes again next year, so we can enjoy such a fine tea again. Naren take note!

Anyway, moving on from culinary affairs, the skipper opened the bowling with a brand new cherry, kindly donated by the opposition (we must make sure we repay the favour next year!). Andy bowled a tight, probing line, but didn't feel that he would ever take any wickets. Martin had more joy at the other end though, with some pacy, but noisier than usual bowling. Indeed, it is not clear whether the two wickets he snaffled were the result of out-thinking the batsmen, or putting them off with his disconcerting 'sex-grunt', emitted at the delivery stride of every effort ball.

First change bowlers Ling and Hodgson followed up the good work of the openers with fairly regular wickets, as Hawes batsmen found it difficult to get themselves in. With Phil finishing with tidy figures of 2 for 24 off 6 overs, Hodgson and Gundry took responsibility for finishing off the resistance of the Hawes middle order and tail, with both finishing with three wickets apiece.

Whilst Hodgson dealt with the threatening middle order with some prodigious swing, Gundry decided to wait until the under 10's came into bat before getting in on the wicket-taking act. Whilst Hodgson, when bowling to the youngsters, reduced his pace from sluggish to snailish (and was inevitably thrashed for two on the off-side), Gundry showed no such sympathy for the youngsters. Displaying an almost Narenesque lack of compassion, he whistled down some straight ones (albeit off a short run up!) and cleaned up the tail with little fuss.

So, a great performance from the Exiles, on a difficult pitch, and without a full team. Had Hawes not had a few of their better batsmen pull out on the morning of the match the game could have been quite a lot more competitive. As it was, the Exiles enjoyed a great game of cricket, in a lovely setting, and are looking forward to playing there again on next years tour.

Report By: John Hodgson

Captains log: Andrew Wingfield

After a poor start, you must have feared being back in the Fountain before tea!

Absolutely - the Exiles were stunned by a slower pitch than I think any of us had ever played on before - and losing the toss was a bad idea; that said, the two young Hawes openers bowled with good control and a bit of natural shape and caused problems;

Did you expect such a struggle on that pitch?

Probably not - it didn't look too bad - but I guess being told before the game that the pitch had been underwater only 3 or so days before the game was a warning! Also, learning that the highest score by any team playing at Hawes this season is 145 odd was not insignificant - so even at 40 odd for 5, I knew that whatever runs we could get to defend would be critical - especially as we had a pretty good bowling line-up.

That said I felt we (I) had a huge slice of luck when I got let off a very serious lbw shout first ball - when I'd come in at 41 for 5 - with the tail exposed then, we may well have crumbled to 50 all out - and whilst I didn't go on to score many runs, I felt I at least stayed there long enough to steady the ship and start allowing Simon to get his eye in.

Simon's inning was surprisingly restrained by his standards?

Simon played an excellent innings - he was necessarily very watchful at the start - as he figured out a way to play on the pitch - before opening up much later on in his innings. He still nearly ended up with a strike rate of 100 - so you can't say it was that restrained (eh, Keith?).

Martin's all round performance was perhaps the clearest indication he has fully recovered from his serious knee injury

Possibly - he didn't seem too hampered by injury - though he did state that he hurt his knee at one point with a super-stretch, whilst he was reluctant to break his bowling up into two spells;

I did think, however, that he produced one of the most terrific all-round performances the world of cricket has ever seen; when coming into bat at 76 for 6, he immediately assumed the authoritative role in his partnership with Simon - showing that with a classical forward defencive technique it was possible to play correctly on the Hawes surface. With Simon clearly panicking and starting to hit 4s and 6s, Martin started taking control of the strike - for 4 straight overs at one point - with beautifully worked-into-the-gap singles off the last ball of the over - to protect his team-mate; I think my heart skipped a beat when he crashed the leg side full toss into the square leg boundary - so awesome was the power and audacity of the stroke. There disappointingly wasn't much opportunity for Martin to demonstrate his wonderful cover-drive to us all on this occasion - but I guess his savvy cricket mind decided that it wasn't the pitch to be playing such strokes. Wonderful. It was a shock when he did finally get out - though I guess he took pity on the opposition bowlers - who must have been completely demoralised in the face of such fabulous batsmanship - and Martin is a very fair man - realising that his abundance of talent clearly elevates him several echelons higher that any of the other players in the match and it really won't be fair for him to continue showing off. And after such batting heroics - it certainly seems a travesty that Simon got more runs than him - Martin was still able to open the bowling with terrific pace and accuracy; talk about bowling a heavy ball - I've lost count of the number of times the ball thudded into the batsman's pads. Martin modestly chose to only take 2 wickets on this occasion - knowing that the game was already all but won - and allowing some other mere mortals a chance to contribute. He is an example to us all and it is an absolute honour to be in the same side as him.

Any chance he might get that promotion up the order?

Nope

The opposition were a very young side, but showed huge promise

Sure - particularly the opening bowlers and also their opening batsman - who I think kept wicket as well. In a year or two's time - this fixture may well start to get a bit more tricky than it already is for us! That said, I think it was somewhat of a relief for regular Exiles tourists to not have to come up against the Lincolnshire under 16 side that is Caythorpe.

Despite being the only match of the weekend, the pitch and its surroundings were worth the long trip from London?

Definitely - I personally thoroughly enjoyed the weekend - 3 days of eating and drinking in the wonderful setting of the Yorkshire Dales - along with an excellent days cricket and a long walking trip on the Sunday - was great; I'd have loved to have played at Middleham as well - but we can save that one till next year. I think we're all very grateful to John Hodgson for organising the trip and look forward to returning next year - hopefully with a full 11 next time and hopefully in slightly more pleasant weather!

Interviewed By: Jasper Searle

Interview with Man of the Match: Simon Gundry

Simon, great knock on a precarious pitch, some way to make a 1st 50 for the Exiles?

Yes it was good to get that maiden 50 for Exiles after getting close on a couple of occasions earlier in the season. And I guess it was particularly satisfying given the challenging soggy surface and the state of play when I went into bat.

You nearly got crocked in an encounter with a dead hedgehog, turned up at the ground with your cricket shoes back in Wimbledon, and with your contact lenses having fallen out … you cant have been feeling the greatest?!

First of all that hedgehog was not dead when I left it! I'm certain it hissed when I gave it a gentle poke. After leaving it carefully protected, clearly some drunken lout later trampled the poor sod to death. Waking up to find a contact lens missing (and no spares) was certainly not the most auspicious start to the day. Fortuitously, Amil generously came to the rescue with some spares, only to find that with restored vision I'd left my cricket shoes in London! I can't say I was a happy bunny at that stage but the chance to dress up as Dickie Bird soon helped soothe my irritation.

How important was Martin's resolute little innings in partnership with you in perhaps taking the game away from the opposition?

Martin played a crucial innings in the context of the game - perhaps more important than my own in so many ways! Having consolidated early on and taken time to adapt to the pitch, it was helpful to have a solid partnership which allowed me to start attacking and finally launch some balls into the river which I'd been eyeing up all innings. It was also very considerate of Martin to shepherd me to 50 by protecting the strike and calming my nerves!

you also chipped in with a few wickets, but by cutting the pace … no problems adjusting from your usual pace?

Well it's always nice to have a bowl and pick up some cheap wickets with some gentle off spin (one of which even turned) at the end of their innings. Glad you pointed out the reduced pace especially the case against the youngsters, which I think was more truthful than how John described it in his match report!

one final question; any idea why the local wildlife seemed to object to you throughout the weekend??!

No idea! After all I was only trying to be friendly to the horse by feeding him some grass. It's not my fault that the horse misinterpreted my act of goodwill as a sexual advance. Clearly, the little filly (or stallion) hadn't seen much action for a while and its desperation became evident when once I'd made my escape it made a play for Andy and Martin! By the way it was a great tour and I hope we can go back there next year …

Interviewed By: Jasper Searle

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